The Low Down on High Times

The Low Down on High Times

The Four Noble Truths of Buddhism all express the thought that life is painful, and as an increasingly disabled person, I can attest to that fact.


It’s a very long, complex, and sad tale, and for that reason, I may or may not explore the genesis of my very intense and personal suffering.

The past is over, but unlike eggs, it ain’t over easy. In the here and now, I deal with debilitating physical, physiological, and spiritual suffering. Some of it I bring on myself, and some of it dropped out of the sky and landed on my head.

The only thing I have even a modicum of control over is how I react to all the bullshit that has come tumbling down all around me.

Luckily for me, a very old and dear friend from my pseudo-hippy youth has returned in a whole new way – even while we are reeling by Da Trump’s presidency, a bright light does shine because Cannabis is back. And the Green Dragon, now legal in some states, has blossomed into dozens of different forms and literally thousands of very specific strains meant to do certain things to us and for us.

And thankfully, one of those things is pain management.

And so, with little else to do, and nowhere to go (I’m semi-bedridden and mostly house-bound) I have begun to teach myself the fine art of essential oils distillation.

And while I am committed to a sober, non-alcohol lifestyle, I have no intention of either suffering like a stuck pig for the rest of my life nor do I want to get stoned – although sometimes I do, almost by accident.

Part of making essential oils with hemp is that each batch is different, some stronger than others. And as long as I use the plant to make topical creams and salves, getting a buzz on isn’t really a danger.

Thus far, however, I’ve found that, especially at night, I might need to take a couple of hits of my vape pen, or even place a drop or two of oil under my tongue.

On the rare occasion that I underestimate the strength of what I’m taking, I have gotten off my nut. And it comes out of nowhere – BOOM! Suddenly, you are fucked up – way, way too stoned.

It’s at these times that life seems especially bleak. I get super paranoid, and all that ex-Catholic guilt comes zipping through my brain.


If you happen too get too stoned on cannabis, there are some simple things you can do to chill out. I don’t know about you, but “overdosing” on weed takes the form of intense anxiety, and the feeling that I’m standing on a precipice staring down an infinitely deep, dark hole.

A little bit like hell on earth.

First of all, don’t panic. Humans have interacted with this plant for literally thousands of years, and if it was gonna kill somebody, it certainly would have by now. But there have never been any reports of a cannabis overdose.

Black pepper and lemon both contain elements that help shut down your ability to process the THC molecule. So grind some pepper up into the palm of your hand, sniff it, and then very gently lick a little bit into your mouth. Do it a few times.

Now grab a half a lemon – Meyer lemons are great because you can actually eat the rind, and suck on that baby like you mean it.

If you can, get in bed. Pull the covers up tight and switch on some music. Make sure it’s not some Jackson Browne record that’s all sensitive and shit, and just lie there, close your eyes, and soon you’ll more than likely fall asleep.

Whew! That was a close call!